Stag Dare Of The Week: Stitch Up The Stag

stag weekends

Everybody knows somebody who can’t stop themselves from falling asleep after a few bevvies. It doesn’t matter where they are, be it in the middle of a packed nightclub, at a restaurant or house party, the person in question will quite happily doze off surrounded by fifty people as fire alarms go off and music blares out from the speakers. And of course we aren’t talking from experience here, but merely speculating. Ahem, anyway, moving swiftly on.

Stitching up the main man has long been a tradition on stag weekends, be it handcuffing him to a lamppost or, in Marvin Humes of JLS fame’s case, a dwarf. But for this week’s stag do dare we want to see photographic evidence of the stag being stitched up good and proper. We want to see him passed out, with Wotsits up his nose, lipstick on, hands sellotaped together, or whatever other hilarious stuff you can think of.

Take the photo above for example. This poor young fellow went round his mate’s house for a few ciders and ended up getting his toenails painted and being drawn on as more and more people arrived, turning it into something of a party (we are fans of the ‘cum here’ sign in particular). He is particularly known for falling asleep after a couple of jars and no his name shall not be disclosed here. Certainly not.

The hard bit is getting the stag into a state where he’ll be sleepy enough to allow for things like human Buckeroo, especially if he can handle his booze. Now we aren’t advocates of getting someone drunk without their consent but in this case we don’t think he’ll be complaining when you spike his beer with a slug of vodka and are constantly lining up the Jaeger bombs. If you are by chance heading off on a Ibiza stag party then there’ll be bonus points for sleepy photos in the middle of a nightclub, the Iberian isle being well known for its banging soundsystems.

Good luck men!

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