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Sumo Wrestling stag weekends: What to expect

The older we get, the less our athletic careers seem like a reality. A lifetime of too much bad food, too much delicious beer and too much good living has probably pushed that out of our grasp. That said – you may have accidently created the perfect body for a certain sport. Sumo wrestling. So why don’t we bring it to your stag do for you to demonstrate your ‘athletic prowess’.

Now whereas in Japan sumo wrestling can be thought of as a traditional martial art treated with a huge amount of reverence, on your do it’ll be a much less serious and much more fun affair. Apparently sumo wrestlers can sometimes consume up to 10,000 calories a day. You might need a little help getting into quite that shape. So we’ll provide you with a custom made sumo suit that will make you look like a terrifying huge baby in a thong – and that’s all the equipment that you’ll need. Before you know it you’ll be flinging yourself into your mates at high octane speed in an attempt to knock them out for the sumo ring. Will you be named king of the sumo stags!?

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Sounds pretty horrific doesn't it and let me ask you this; if you saw a load of fat bastards living together in a communal 'stable' then you'd probably think they were in some kind of army fat camp or demented stag parties. Either one you'd be right.

Now let's leave Japan with It's ancient art of sumo and move much nearer to home.

For those stag parties amongst us who've always wondered what it's like to be fat well now's your chance. Without spending days on end eating pickled eggs, burgers and as much junk food as possible we now, thanks to modern technology, can not only transform ourselves into fat bastards but can also unleash the inner warrior.

Squeeze yourself into a custom made sumo suit and you'll look like a big naked baby in a horrific thong. But none of that matters when you attack you're mate and throw him out of the circle in an effort to be crowned Stag Do Sumo King.

"Sumo is competitive and remember to use every fat trick in the book"

Sumo is competitive and remember to use every fat trick in the book to force your contender out of the ring or get them to touch the ground with anything other than the soles of their feet. Game on!

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