How to… write the grooms speech

Let’s face it, most grooms don’t get too involved with their wedding plans. Some do, but let’s assume your missus has taken charge of 98% of the wedding planning, which means that as a groom there are only a few things you need to get right,

Now it’s not a long list but it’s an important one, and writing the grooms speech is something that many grooms get horribly wrong.

So sit back and read on because in this blog post I'm going to help you write the best speech EVER using these Top 5 tips on how to write the grooms speech.

Bullet point the romantic milestones of your relationship

Do this first as it’ll help shape and structure your speech: getting in the key dates/moments is an easy way to keep the speech on topic and at a reasonable length. The list should be no longer and one side of A4. If it is longer, review it when you’re done and narrow it down to the top 5 milestones. After all, the aim of the speech is to be romantic, funny, punchy and precise. It’s also meant to be a sentimental reflection of your relationship, so make your future-wife feel special  by reminding her that you do remember the special moments (first date, first kiss, first flat/house, where you proposed etc.) Trust us; it’ll earn you major “good husband” points.

Keep the lovey-dovey cheese to a minimum

Women want romance but most modern women don’t want you to start reciting Lord Byron-esque love poetry.  So make sure you don’t overdo it by avoiding the clichés such as “They say you don’t marry someone you can live with... you marry the person who you can’t live without.” Keep it original and specific to your relationship, that way you’ll sound more sincere and less like you copy and pasted a free version you found on Google.

Don’t bring up private/embarrassing stories or Ex’s

Telling the odd funny story is fine. So long as it’s PG rated, mild enough for your Nan and doesn’t paint the bride in a bad light. That’s right, you might want to leave out the time you and the missus had “fun” in the car during her nephew's christening. Similarly don’t dig up dead relationships, especially if there are ex’s present at the wedding - not even in a funny way. It’s just awkward and uncomfortable for everyone - so don’t do it.

Be happy, Sound happy (and sober!)

You’re married! It’s your big day and you should be feeling like the luckiest guy alive (if you’re not then there’s something wrong there...) So make sure you keep that in mind when you deliver your speech. Don’t say things like “This is actually a Tesco shopping list…” or (heaven forbid!) “The ball and chain made me write this...” because despite what most groom advice sites will tell you, no bride wants to be associated with the "nagging wife" stereotype. Seriously, it's not funny and it's not flattering.

Relax and look into her eyes

Yes everyone can hear the speech but looking into the eyes of your bride whilst you read the speech will make her very happy. So relax and enjoy the moment! Tell your wife and the crowd just how much she means to you. Feel free to shed a manly tear if the water works start, but make sure it doesn’t turn you into a blubbering mess and ruin all your hard work. Finally, if you get really stuck, your best man will know how you feel, as he has to write a speech too, so you could always brainstorm ideas together. However writing the speech is not as hard as it sounds. Just make sure you follow the above 5 steps and you should have no problem writing that funny, touching wedding speech that everybody is going to remember and love.