Quad Biking - My Personal Experience

For whatever reason, I’d never been on a Quad Bike so was well happy when we decided to do it for my mate Dick’s stag do. I didn't know much about them, except that Ozzy Osbourne had nearly been killed on his, and if it was good enough for a guy who once bit the head off a bat I figured it was good enough for me.

Choosing winter, it was bloody cold, but I’d double socked and was glad I hadn't thrown away the rip-off wellies I’d got from Glastonbury this year. The Quad place gave us overalls and helmets, but definitely wear your worst clothes, because even though we were top to toe in bright yellow overalls, there was a load of rain from the week before and it was muddy as hell – and the guy taking us round wasn't shy to show us what his beauties could do through 2 feet of water. Oh, and take gloves to go under the ones they might give you. My hands were frozen.

We went off as a group with one of the instructors at the front to lead us through the outdoor track of mud and forest. At first we thought this was a bit shit, thinking it would be like a school trip, except that we had some quad guru who put our adventure efforts to shame. There was also another guy who brought up the rear (wahey), which was funny as we’d put lanky Dan at the back. We all know he drives like a lady, and he didn't disappoint, dragging his arse and no doubt pissing off the bloke who had to shepherd him like the crippled piece of livestock we know and love him as.

I have to say I was surprised at how fast these machines can go on open ground they’re well nippy, but have the grunt and the power to handle the bump and grind. Once I got past my thoughts of being thrown off over a bump and ending up like Ozzy I was steering and pushing them at any incline and ditch I could find and was hard pushed to give it something it couldn’t handle. They’re like a car and motorbike in one, only better. On the trail you’re waiting for the next muddy bank, and as with anything, once you get covered in filthy water there’s no going back just dive in. The track was part man made, part through the forest and even though the guys had done a sterling job making some almost breakneck trenches, there was something just a bit cooler and muddier about going through the wood.

I’d definitely recommend it, and as for the bikes, we were on 250cc bikes which gave us all the power we needed. (manly grunt noise to be inserted here)